so I have a lot to say

The style Salinger uses to write this story is very very different from any other story I have read. It almost seems disorganized and the plot seems to just be centered around the fact that Holden is leaving school early because he wants to. 

He does and says as he pleases. He calls everyone either “nice”, old, or (my favorite) a phony bastard. 

Anyway I think it is Holden’s thinking process. It sometimes reminds me of my thinking process, too. I will be thinking one thing (sometimes even while listening to someone that is talking to me) then I see something, anything, that reminds me of a particular memory and then suddenly I am recalling that memory, ya know? He remembers the most randomest things but I like it. It makes the Catcher in the Rye that much deeper and relatable. There are times where he is directly talking to someone such is in the very beginning where he doesn't talk much about his family and background and again when he is telling us how he is “the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life” and when he is talking about Allie “you would’ve liked him.”

             

As I start the first chapter I can’t help but think a) Holden is so full of himself and b) he doesn't care about anything nor about the consequences of his actions and c) he is so judgmental!!!

“Only we didn't have the meet. I left all the foils and equipment and stuff on the goddam subway. It wasn't all my fault. I had to keep getting up to check on the map, so we’d know where to get off. So we got back to Pencey at two-thirty instead of around dinnertime. The whole team ostracized me the whole way back on the train. It was pretty funny, in a way.”

Here he admits some fault but also gives an excuse for it. He, despite being the manager, was too busy looking at a map to also keep track of the team’s equipment, an innocent mistake.

So we learn he is on top of Thomsen Hill overlooking the most important football game of the season. I like the way Salinger includes this scene to portray Holden. Salinger makes it very clear that Holden thinks he is above everyone else when he is on top of literally looking down on everyone. In this scene we also learn that he is all alone as he doesn't have anyone to share such an incredible view with. He is also down there as everyone was still mad at him for leaving the fencing equipment behind. So that must have sucked for him that he felt the need to not even show up. I think he covers that up by saying “The other reason I wasn’t at the game was because i was on my way to say good-by to old Spencer, my history teacher.” How convenient. He doesn't even mention how he came across this view like he does with Spencer’s navajo blanket.

Chapter five is one of my favorite parts. Holden opens up. A lot. He does the composition for Stadlater and, of all things, he  writes about his dead brother’s baseball glove. First of all, he didn't want to write about just anything, even though a) it is not for him b) Stadlater said “Anything. Anything descriptive. A room. Or a house. Or something you once lived in or something -- you know. Just as long as it’s descriptive as hell.” c) his reaction once Stadlater read it.

“I’m not too crazy about describing rooms and houses anyway. So what I did, I wrote about my brother Allie’s baseball mitt. It was a very descriptive subject. It really was.”

He is so defensive about being so thoughtful. Like yeah no big deal, anyone would’ve done this too. He doesn't want to admit that he is capable of doing great things, recognize his potential. Did he write it for Stadlater (nah) or for his brother? Or for himself???
Earlier, he said the only reason he was passing English was because he learned that same material in his previous school. (but was that really why??) I think he secretly really likes English. He has a pretty strong vocabulary at the most random times. It also happens to be the only class he is passing. I don't think he has ever been so open with an assignment and since it wasn't going to be under his name, he went for it. But then Stadlater messed with that when he got mad at Holden for doing the assignment, as well as everything else,”backasswards.” of course, it set off Holden as it was personal to him. I love how he asked for it back only to rip it in front of Stadlater. I thought that was a perfect response!!!! Then he starts to smoke which I think is a nervous habit of his.

Holden mentions they were only two years apart and from the way he looks back at his brother, it’s all awe, love, and praise. Clearly they were very close. For him to think of writing about something as trivial as a baseball mitt, is very touching and sentimental.

I think this is very significant that he mentions his younger brother in a much higher regard as opposed to his older brother D.B. Before he didn't have anyone close to him or that really meant anything to him (maybe Jane Gallagher) and now he talks about his brother Allie in pure awe, love, and praise. This is one of the first times he has talked about someone in a more in depth positive note. Everyone else has been described pretty disgusting/negatively ex (D.B., Ackley, Mr. Spencer, Stadlater [despite his attractiveness attributes]). Then Holden mentions how his brother’s death really affected him. He resorts to violent behavior as a coping mechanism.

Overall, just showed this very vulnerable and struggling side of him.

“Ask her if she still keeps her kings in the back row.”

“Give her my regards.”

I thought it was very interesting how Holden refuses to recognize he is jealous that Stadlater went out with Jane Gallagher. I guess not many guys would. He kept saying, “I just had a feeling something had gone funny.” He tried to interrogate Stadlater about their date and “if he gave her the time.” Of course Holden doesn't explain why he wants to know so bad. But he does because Jane is one of the few people Holden seems to care about. He is worried about her, which makes sense as he used to have strong feelings about her. He seems to still have some of those feelings lingering as he keeps reminisce these little quirks of hers despite the several years that have passed.

He loves his hunting hat. He wears it the same way every time, always repeating the same line “I put my red hunting hat on, turned the peak around to the back, the way I liked it.”

Whenever he puts on his hunting hat (it is referenced a lot throughout the book), it reminded of me of that scene from Big Daddy with Adam Sandler where he tells his kid “If you’re afraid, put these sunglasses on and you’ll become invisible.” I think Holden’s hat serves the same purpose. Or maybe it is just to cover up the gray hairs he has.

I thought it was very interesting how he doesn't like receiving gifts as it makes him sad. I think he overthinks the meaning behind them. And he is very picky with what he likes so he gets disappointed when he doesn't get what he likes. Not necessarily unappreciative but just disappointed the person wasn’t really paying attention to what he likes or didn't really bother with the gift. Also he was very brief with packing. Few things were packed/mentioned meaning he doesn't have a lot of stuff either worth mentioning to us or worth packing. Everything he owns fits in his bag. Maybe he hasn't been there long or he isn't that rich but still. Of all things he does mention are the skates his mother gave him. He tries to brush them saying they are the wrong kind of skates he desired but nonetheless he’d feel bad if something were to happen to them or didn't keep them. Finally, of course he has a lovely exit. He looks at the corridor once time before shouting “sleep tight, ya morons!”

“‘Oh, I feel some concern for my future, all right. Sure. Sure I do.’ I thought about it for a minute. ‘But not too much, I guess.’”

“One of the biggest reasons I left Elkton Hills was because I was surrounded by phonies.”

We learn that he has flunked out of a few schools for the main reason that he doesn't apply himself because he doesn't seem to care. Sure he blames it on the phonies (#ifeel #fakepeopleshowingfakelove)

But I think he is just afraid to get close to a place (school) and people. He doesn't seem to be close to/is friends with anyone. He wouldn’t tell Ackley about the fight but then asked him for his life story. I think he doesn't want to get attached to anyone or anything as then it means he is trusting people with this, almost, ability/power over him, to hurt him. Or that they will leave him either unintentionally or for someone else. Holden also tries to make a joke out of it but he never tells Ackley the truth. He doesn't speak highly of actors and movies. He doesn't like either of them as they are literally fake (I see his point but that’s extreme). He likes to smoke when he is in distress. The fact that he just decides to leave a couple days early with no concrete plan is rather reckless and sporadic. I think these are all signs pointing to depression. Especially where in chapter 7 there is a brief moment where he gets sad and even wishes for death.